Nice Things

It has been a nice few days.  You know when you complain to a girlfriend about how horrible your man is, and then like an hour later he is sweet as pie and you feel bad for saying all those things… and you hate that now your girlfriend thinks your man is completely evil….  That’s how I feel.  Yea, we have so many ups & downs in our marriage.  The last few days have been full of “UPS”.  Nice things.

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He slept with me.  In the same bed.  Rare occurrence.  I did not know he was there until morning.  I went to bed exhausted.  I smiled when I woke up and heard him breathing next to me.

His parents came over for dinner.  He was playing footsie with me under the table.  It felt warm and familiar.

He is all about building this back porch and is very interested in how I would like it done.  I was not prepared to offer my opinion, it is usually not welcomed, usually I must fight to be heard.  I feel acknowledged.

I was trying to remove a splinter from the bottom of my foot.  He got the tweezers and dug it out.  Without growling once.  And without being asked.

He commented on my hair.  He noticed the color was different than I usually do it.  He didn’t say if he liked it better or not.  I didn’t ask.  But he noticed.  He never notices.

Yesterday afternoon, the kids were riding around the yard on 4-wheelers and go karts.  I was sitting on the porch, just watching them and enjoying the day, hoping they were burning off the sugar rush from the Easter candy.  He came and sat with me.  We gabbed about nothing in particular.  It felt easy.

He said “The kids and I should really cook supper 2 or 3 times a week and help you out.”  I almost dropped dead.  Huh?  He said he knew I hated it.  He said he wouldn’t mind as long as he knew what to cook.  He doesn’t want to have to figure that out, but he’ll do it……

Dare I type it out loud?  He has only sworn once (at least in front of me) since our argument the other night.  I feel giddy.

Who is this man and what have you done with my husband?

None of these are big things.  They are just nice things.  I want more of them in my life.

Today, I feel peaceful.

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This blog is my personal journal. I am trying hard to save my marriage. No, I am trying to build a great marriage. In case you haven't heard, marriage is HARD!
I am fighting back against anxiety & panic attacks. This is year 5 of this adventure. I am also codependent. I am an ACOA. Fun, Fun. I am trying hard to become a better me.
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