Pretending is Progress

I told hubby that I was running errands & going to buy Kid3 jeans tonight.

I hate the look he gave me.

I pretended not to notice and he pretended he didn’t glared at me.

(Sadly, that’s progress in our marriage!  Better than a knock down drag out fight about going shopping don’t you think?  Yay us. )

He is all Mr. Independent who doesn’t need anyone –  until I go somewhere and he has to handle supper, basketball practice, homework, showers, etc.  He gets all fussed up every time I go somewhere in the evening!  Drives me nuts.  He doesn’t tell me not to go or anything – and he would never admit that it is a problem for him.  But he gets all stressed out and if I’m gone too long, he’s a bear when I get back.

Makes me want to find more things to do in the evenings so he learns to deal with it!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And now I’m back.  He wasn’t a bear tonight.  But apparently I was invisible for about an hour after I got home :)  I guess that’s better than having to argue with a bear.

I love shopping at Salvation Army.  We have one very close to Target where I was planning to buy jeans for Kid3 tonight.  I decided to stop in there first and check.  They usually do not have many boys pants because boys wear them out!  But tonight I got lucky.  I found 5 really great pairs of jeans for him.  Good brands too.  They are in the washer right now.  They cost between $2 and $4 a pair.  I love a good bargain!

The way he goes through jeans… these may last 3 months?  lol  Seriously!  He’s got holes in the knees and grass stains on most of his.  He kept saying he didn’t have any clean jeans for school and I couldn’t figure out why.  I counted his jeans – out of his 9 pair – only 2 were still hole-free!  That’s crazy cuz when school started I bought him 4 pair and he already had at least a few that were decent.  What’s that – 4 months?  Yep, he’s all boy!

Kid1 went with me and it was very nice to have some one on one time with her.  I got to here about school and friends – stuff  that she doesn’t really talk about in the daily chaos of our home.  I really enjoyed her company :)

I am determined to go to bed early tonight and catch up on some sleep!  I am babysitting my nephew tomorrow.  He’s a little 6 month old bundle of fun!  Won’t get much work done but I’m going to look at it as a much needed break and some play time!

Good night all.

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2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. IAAMM
    Dec 06, 2011 @ 23:03:46

    To bad you couldn’t hold out ’til Christmas…could’ve killed two birds with one stone. Oh well, a mums gotta do what a mums gotta do :)

    I see that many of us are coping with this marriage thing..whew! We’ll make it through ;)

    Reply

  2. Laura
    Dec 08, 2011 @ 12:03:13

    What I’ve been learning, or working on learning at least, is that my husband’s reactions to me and my choices are his problem. Not mine. While I used to feel the need to explain myself, or worse, when it used to get me sucked into an argument, it doesn’t anymore. I just chalk it up to being his issue and I won’t let him rain on my parade. Easier said than done sometimes, but I really feel like it is making a difference in how I see the world. In a good way. As I work on disengaging myself from his drama, I feel freer and freer. Now I can clearly see when he is trying to engage me in an argument, and when I see it, I don’t let it happen. It’s not worth ruining my day over his malarkey. I’ve felt a shift in the dynamic of late, and I feel good for the first time in a long, long time.

    So, I am rambling on (as usual), trying to say, I think your choice to ignore was awesome. Because his glaring at you is his problem and not yours. I think it is fantastic that you didn’t take that on as something you needed to deal with. It wasn’t.

    My two cents.

    Also – Now I want to go to the Salvation Army. LOL! I love a good bargain :-)

    I am glad you were able to shop and have fun and not let him cloud your joy, and not let his mood worry you.

    Reply

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This blog is my personal journal. I am trying hard to save my marriage. No, I am trying to build a great marriage. In case you haven't heard, marriage is HARD!
I am fighting back against anxiety & panic attacks. This is year 5 of this adventure. I am also codependent. I am an ACOA. Fun, Fun. I am trying hard to become a better me.
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