It’s a Roller Coaster

Today hubby was very nice and very normal.  This is what throws me for such a loop!

Today after the kids all left on the bus for school, we drank coffee and gabbed.  Then he went to sleep and I got to work.

When he woke up, he worked on getting the heat turned on since the colder weather seems here to stay.  Then we packed some sandwiches etc and headed to the school.  We were getting Kid3 at the elementary school, feeding him a sandwich,  and walking down to Kid2’s Jr High basketball game.  Kid1 was meeting us there for a short while to get her supper and watch Kid2’s game until it was time for her to catch the bus for her away volleyball game.

He was a wonderfully supportive father, cheering her on and enjoying the game.  He helped Kid3 do his math during the game.  He sat behind me on the bleachers so I could lean back against him.  We looked like a married couple that likes each other.  Then we all went to the grocery store.  Then we came home and cooked and ate supper together.  We talked a bit more and helped Kid2 with her report on the Columbian Exchange.  Then hubby went to his mom’s house to move a desk or something she needed help with.  Now he’s back and he and kid3 are watching a football game together.

He was nice.  Pleasant.  Easy to talk to.  Fun, even. NORMAL.

Why can’t he always be normal?  Why does he flip into jerk mode and terrorize us all?


3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Sofia Leo
    Sep 19, 2013 @ 22:33:26

    There are stages and patterns. This is the Honeymoon Period, that time where he’s back to being the man you fell in love with, the perfect father and husband. This is Dr. Jekyll. Mr. Hyde will be along shortly, right about the time you start to relax and question if you’ve been over-reacting…


  2. Laura
    Sep 20, 2013 @ 16:18:59

    EXACTLY what Sofia Leo said. Also, this is how they keep us vulnerable and off kilter. We question ourselves, we think we’re overreacting, we decide to forget about what they’ve done, and then BAM the honeymoon ends! Of course the next Jerk-A-Palooza is followed by another honeymoon…rinse and repeat. That’s how they keep us hooked. If they were all one thing or the other a majority of the time, we wouldn’t be so confused.


  3. Zoe
    Sep 20, 2013 @ 17:22:17

    yep. And as much as I want to tell him off about how he has been acting, I won’t. Because the weekend is here. Kid3 has a friend staying over tonight. We are canning tomatoes tonight. We will have to be around each other all weekend and the kids will be here and I really don’t want to start another battle. So I guess it means he wins this one. Again. (If you can call it winning????)
    I have been “distant” I guess with him since all his melt-downs last weekend. I think he noticed and that’s why he is being nice. I want to ask him if he even realizes that the way he acted was completely insane. But I wont ask him cuz I don’t want to deal with the crap. I want to can these stupid tomatoes and go to bed.


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This blog is my personal journal. I am trying hard to save my marriage. No, I am trying to build a great marriage. In case you haven't heard, marriage is HARD!
I am fighting back against anxiety & panic attacks. This is year 5 of this adventure. I am also codependent. I am an ACOA. Fun, Fun. I am trying hard to become a better me.
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